


I want you to be happy

by milky_toast_06



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: AU, Angst, Fanon, Kenma, KuroKen - Freeform, Kuroo - Freeform, Long Distance Relationship, Love, M/M, Romance, angsty, angsty romance, long distance, relationship
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-13
Updated: 2020-11-13
Packaged: 2021-03-10 05:00:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,227
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27538762
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/milky_toast_06/pseuds/milky_toast_06
Summary: If Kenma had to be completely honest, he wasn’t looking for anything serious. He was just bored, and he’d already reached the highest level he could in his game, so he had time to spare. Not that he would call it a fling, though. He was “going with the flow”, and besides, his mother had said that she’d allow him to buy himself a new game if he did all this “dating app” shit. Either way, if Kenma ended up truly liking the person, he didn’t mind spending less time on the computer, cooped up at home.
Relationships: Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou
Comments: 2
Kudos: 16





	I want you to be happy

Kuroo and Kenma had met over a dating app. It was weird, really. Kenma had never believed in this kind of thing--that is, love, and especially finding love through texting. But it was convenient at least. He didn’t _have_ to go out, and show his face all that much. So to be frank, he didn’t know why he was complaining.

If Kenma had to be completely honest, he wasn’t looking for anything serious. He was just bored, and he’d already reached the highest level he could in his game, so he had time to spare. Not that he would call it a fling, though. He was “going with the flow”, and besides, his mother had said that she’d allow him to buy himself a new game if he did all this “dating app” shit. Either way, if Kenma ended up truly liking the person, he didn’t mind spending less time on the computer, cooped up at home. 

Of course, this didn’t mean that he had intended for himself to actually fall in love, and to fall that hard. 

When Kenma and Kuroo first started texting, it honestly seemed to Kenma that Kuroo was a dirty, perverted old geezer, but...Kuroo wasn’t, as it turned out. In fact, Kenma and Kuroo were both around the same age, with a mere one year difference. Kuroo was just looking for someone with a nice personality that complemented his, and preferably someone with long hair. And was interested in chemistry. 

Kenma recalled thinking Kuroo was some sort of psychopath, for looking for such weird things in people. Kenma didn’t find Kuroo all too interesting either, and truthfully, he wasn’t too into Kuroo, but he decided to give him a chance.

After all, as much as Kenma loved his games, he had to admit that living on his own for the rest of his life seemed like a rather drabby idea. They exchanged phone numbers, and pictures of themselves to each other. Their first conversation, Kenma had to say, was pretty amusing.

Kenma had just told Kuroo that he probably wasn’t the kind of person he was interested in, since he was absolutely garbage in science, to which Kuroo had just sent a shrugging emoji, saying he didn’t really care. Kenma was confused; wasn’t that what a bio was for? To state one’s preferences? 

Well it didn’t matter that much. It made Kenma smile. After messaging back and forth for a few days, Kuroo initiated a meet-up. Kenma’s new game still hadn’t come so he agreed. 

They clicked instantly. Perhaps it was that moment where Kenma realised that Kuroo wasn’t that bad. And he could be rather attractive as well. The bedhead Kuroo had looked less like a rooster the more Kenma looked at it. They went out on multiple dates after that, even when Kenma’s new game finally arrived. 

Kenma loved his game, of course, but hanging out with Kuroo was a different kind of fun. Sure, he hated going out, but with Kuroo, it wasn’t half bad. Kuroo never intentionally invaded his privacy, and was always attentive to Kenma’s reserved personality. Kenma enjoyed it. His own mother had never quite wrapped her head around personal space, so Kuroo being so mindful was a breath of fresh air.

Not to mention Kuroo was easy to talk to, even for Kenma. It wasn’t that Kenma was never annoyed by Kuroo’s stubbornness, but it felt good to have someone around him who cared. 

Kenma knew that week; he was falling. Falling in love, and falling hard. Kenma didn’t want to. He didn’t want to be hurt, or become too attached to anyone. Especially not to bedhead Kuroo. But he couldn’t help it, he realised. His rank on his game was slowly slipping down, and there even came the day he wasn’t on the chart of top players in Japan like he’d once been. 

Kenma, by then, had only known Kuroo for about a month or two, but he had fallen in love for the first time in his life. And he hated it, but it made him realise that all of his past one-week relationships, he’d never actually been in love. Perhaps it’d been just a mere friendship, or infatuation, or whatever, but it wasn’t love. This was love. With Kuroo. 

Kenma had thought that he’d found the person who held the key to his happiness. Kuroo was his biggest cheerleader, and the best friend Kenma ever had. He offered to tutor Kenma for his exams, and was super supportive and caring through it all. They even managed to make time for dates here and there, and Kenma felt like he was in heaven.

Then Kuroo broke it to him; his parents had previously arranged for him to leave the country for further studying. It struck Kenma like a blade. He’d never seen it coming. Kenma was not the kind who was into long distance relationships, and Kuroo was well aware of that. 

So they broke up. They had to. Well, at least until Kuroo finished his studies and returned to Kenma’s side. Kenma had mumbled under his breath his apology over and over again, but deep inside, Kenma wanted Kuroo to fight for what he wanted. He wanted Kuroo to fight for their relationship, to fight for him! But Kuroo stayed silent. 

Why couldn’t Kuroo just say he didn’t want to leave to study? Why didn’t Kuroo appear as desperate as Kenma was? Why? Why was Kuroo such a confident man but didn’t have the guts to say no to his family? Why was Kuroo suddenly such a coward?

Kenma wanted Kuroo to change his mind, to not go study abroad, but Kuroo chose to let Kenma go. They were both still young, and had plenty of years to find someone else if they really ended up drifting apart, Kuroo reasoned. Perhaps they just weren’t made for each other. But Kuroo was lying, Kenma knew. Kuroo had been the one who showed his love more throughout their relationship. 

Kenma settled for just a friendship between them two, then Kuroo left. It’d been four months now, since Kuroo had gone, and they hardly spoke. Kenma wasn’t mad about it though; it was clear they both still loved each other, and he knew the saying: “absence makes the heart grow fonder”. Maybe had they just cut off all contact completely, then Kenma could move on. 

And Kenma could tell; Kuroo wasn’t happy. Kenma wanted Kuroo to be happy, and if being happy for Kuroo meant moving on, then Kenma wanted Kuroo to move on. And if Kuroo really did, Kenma was happy for him.

Kenma wanted Kuroo to learn as much as he could, so when he came back, Kenma could meet a man. A man who was happy with what he was, and a man Kenma could be proud of. 

But for now, Kenma went back to his game. While Kuroo was abroad doing his best, Kenma wanted to do his best as well. And perhaps then, if Kuroo still loved Kenma like Kenma did him, then they could try out a relationship again. And perhaps, just perhaps, the next time they called, Kenma could work up the courage to say the words he’d never been able to say before.

_“Kuroo…”_ Kenma thought silently to himself. 

_"I want you to be happy."_


End file.
